I just do not ever get a chance to catch up with my emotions. I can’t seem to get a fucking break.
I have been trying SO hard to come to terms with the heart issues…trying to accept them and learn to live with the symptoms. I know this won’t happen over night. I know this is going to take work and time. But now, more is thrown at me.
Cassidy was sick this past weekend. She was having stomach cramps which would come and go. They appeared to be gas pains. She did have one day of a fever – not even a whole day. After a round of ibuprophen, it was gone. But the tummy issues stuck around until Sunday night. By Monday she was fine. Or so I thought.
A few days ago, I wrote about her experience with what I think was a PANDAS episode. Well, sure enough…again after an illness, I noticed some eye rolls. I saw a couple last night. I was truly hoping and praying (yes, praying) they were insignificant. But then her teacher told me today that she noticed a few at school.
The teacher only mentioned it because I wrote her a letter about the whole ordeal…shared everything that I did in the blog. She said she has noticed it in the past as well.
I was really hoping it was just a strange event – never to appear again. But it doesn’t look to be the case.
I sent a letter (by fax) today to our Family Doctor. I trust this doctor and have been with her for nearly 20 years. MANY doctors out there straight up do not believe in PANDAS (believe me, I have been reading like a mad woman). I also sent her THIS information. This is very good and interesting information and if you have any interest in this topic, I suggest you read it.I am hoping so much she takes me seriously and doesn’t poo poo it.
I really don’t know what to do at this point. I am going to wait for a response from the doc and HOPE AND PRAY this goes away.
As far as the heart stuff…here is an update…
2 weeks ago I had a conversation with Sunday Muniz at Nutritional Designs. She is always so helpful – being a nutritionist and a pharmacist. VERY very smart. Anyway, she really thought my minerals were probably out of whack. I have heard from a lot of PVC sufferers that magnesium helps a lot. So that was a path I wanted to follow.
She advised me to take a mineral supplement and also said to try a product called Natural Calm at night. Also, I mentioned to her that I was eating about 4-6 cups of baby spinach per day. She said to stop AND limit calcium. The spinach has something called oxalic acid and can mess with the absorbtion of minerals. And calcium competes with the magnesium in the GI tract.
I have taken all of her advice and also started taking epsom salt baths almost daily. This also helps with magnesium absorbtion.
For two weeks – since starting this, I have had very few heart skips (PVCs and PACs). I have been very pleased, but I have not been letting my hopes up.
The true test starts now. Usually 10 days before my period until it is over…that is when my heart goes bonkers. Last month was AWFUL. At least 100 skips a day. There were even moments of skips every 4 beats. And for quite some time, ever minute. It was terrifying. Now, I did feel a couple very slight skips yesterday. And one or two bigger ones today. But my stress level has been VERY high and my sleep has been lacking. These both make a HUGE difference. Anyway, the next 10 days will tell me a lot about how well these changes helping. God, please.
As it turns out, this Natural Calm is also very good for kids with tics and like issues as well. I will be trying this on Cassidy starting tonight. it can’t really hurt and I will be starting with such a small amount.
Anyway…I am just trying to muster through everything right now. I am scared about everything and want to crawl under the covers all day every day. I want this fear to end. I want to have a normal life!!!
Ok. Done whining for the night. Carry on….