Clean as a Whistle…Well…Almost


So I am almost med free. Well…perhaps not compared to the average 37 year old…but much better than I was!! At the beginning of this summer I was taking the following:

300 mg of Wellbutrin

300 mg (I think?) of Lamictal

1 mg of Klonopin

5mg Zyrtec


Now I am taking:

150 mg Wellbutrin (will be stopping but not sure when…soon…worried about increased appetite)

ZERO Lamictal

.5 mg Klonopin EVERY OTHER day

5mg Zyrtec ONLY as needed (was daily…now maybe once a week)

I still take the beta blocker for my heart issues as well as quite a few supplements and vitamins. I am fine with that. I am really quite pleased and haven’t noticed much difference once the withdraw for the Lamictal stopped. I DO feel more tired than usual. And perhaps a little less motivated. But not enough to take more pills. I need to have another talk with Sunday Muniz at Nutritional Designs to make sure I am taking the right vitamins in the right doses. Hopefully that will help with the sleepiness. But, I also realize that I have felt this way (tired) since I was a kid. I slept my way through high school and not the fun kind of “sleeping” either. So I may have to be okay with feeling this way forever.

I don’t think psychiatric medications are bad in general. I think MANY people absolutely need them to function. I think they have helped me as well. 6 years ago, my panic attacks were so debilitating weren’t for the klonopin, I would have had NO life. Jesus they were horrible and much too frequent. That medication saved my life.

But I also think that they over medicate people to the point where no one knows what “normal” feels like anymore. I think mental docs typically take 20 minutes to diagnosed and treat and they are so quick to whip out that Rx pad. And if one med doesnt work? Add another…and perhaps another…and….ugh. No thanks. I got to the point where I didn’t know what was me, the illnesses or the medication effects. What a medicinal cluster-fuck.

I know it is weird to share all this so publically. But I am not the only one out there who deals with this shit, so if even just the familarity can ease one’s mind…it is worth it to me. I know that hearing the stories of others helps me when I am having a hard time. It is often a relief to know that there are others like me and that they have made it through the rougher patches. So there. 😉


About Heather Rayne

I am a mom, wife, writer, volunteer, eater of food, lover of animals and avid TV enthusiast. I am opinionated, honest, compassionate and sensitive. I can also be difficult, hard headed and emotional. I consider myself to have a great sense of humor and am very attracted to that in others. I am striving to live an authentic life. I am attempting to learn how to find happiness in the now. I always have hope to be a better person. That being said - I can be vulgar, negative and even a little bitchy at times. I say what I mean and my filter is often dysfunctional. With me, what you see is what you get. I have strong opinions and am quick to speak my mind. This can cause problems from time to time but I do not ever intend to hurt or offend anyone. With that - be warned. I do hope you enjoy my site. Thanks for visiting and have a swell day.

2 responses »

  1. Glad to see you are blogging again. I miss reading it. We don’t know each other, but for some reason your blog is intriguing to me.

    • Well thank you 🙂 Of course, I am assuming it is like the intrique of a bad car accident….but…still… 🙂 I do appreciate it very much!! I have several blogs waiting to be finished so hopefully there will be more reading very soon. I can’t promise (or even lead you to believe) they will be interesting but they will be there LOL.

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