Today I received news which has left me in a fog. I am mixed with all sorts of feelings of and for myself as well as an old friend. Probably my oldest, dearest friend. When I think about it, actually, besides my family…I have not loved anyone longer. This person was by best friend for a very long time.
My friend learned some scary news about their health recently and after a long estrangement, they wanted to let me know. I have feelings of happiness that it is a good possibility that this person may return to my life. I am hopeful that our friendship can be even half of what it was. But of course, even more, I am worried and fearful about the news of the recent diagnosis. The disease is incurable and difficult. It varies from person to person. The symptoms are elusive and insidious. They can be dormant or debilitating. My friend has a road of unpredictability and worry. And I only hope to help make that road a bit more tolerable.
Like I said, there are so many thoughts and feelings drowning out all the petty shit. So much I want to say. But my friend hasn’t publicly shared anything as far as I know and I do not want to share too much before that personal decision has been made. But I do want to say that I will be here for my friend any day, time or moment I am needed. I will offer anything I can. I will make every effort to be the friend I was long ago. My friend probably will regret getting in touch…because there’s no shakin’ me now!!